Adventures with a Cuban boy: Ya se acabo

The "Adventures with a Cuban boy" string of posts have come to an end since Jose and I decided to end things, but I have a feeling that the actual adventures will never be completely over and even if they are, they will always stay with me because of the things that I learned from him and because of him. While on the subject of Cuban men, I want to address the issue of dating them. I have been optimistic about Cuban men despite all the warnings that people drilled into me, all the stories I heard, and I want to stay that way but stereotypes exist for a reason. Cubans are known for being manipulatively charming, attractive, and mostly chilling with a gringa for money or a ticket out. Although of course not all Cuban men are like that but think about it... If you already knew everyone in your neighborhood and most of the city, were in a dead end job that didn’t pay enough to buy food, and had no chance of leaving the place where you have always lived and never really changed, wouldn’t you want to spend time with the tourists or students who visit? They are usually willing to take you out so they can have a good time with the locals, bringing you to places you can't afford to go by yourself, and they have stories about the outside world that aren’t being fed to you by socialized media. I mean, I would. I'm not trying to justify using people but I also don’t blame them and I don’t judge them. But it gets complicated when a relationship actually begins. I have been judged and gotten weird looks for admitting that I was with a Cuban for so long, "Don't you know he just wants a ticket out?", "Be careful", etc...But I knew the situation I was getting into and I let myself, partly for the naive thought that he was different. And maybe he is. Either way, I feel like it is best to not trust them, even if they may actually be genuine. Then at least you are covering your ass for better or worse. I don't however think that Cuban men should be avoided or scrutinized. After all, relationships are never easy and bad things happen in relationships no matter where the people are from. Just be aware and understanding instead of critical because if you find someone you love, it's worth it to know them and at least try, no matter the circumstances. I knew all of that before I got involved and I knew it during and I know it now. I knew what was coming, I knew what was going on, I knew what would happen. But at the same time I didn’t know and I still don’t and probably never will. Does that make sense? Probably not but there ya go. Asi es la vida…and I wouldn’t take any of it back.